Here are some general rules to follow in life. Some are humorous, and others are just "" inducing.

For the record, I'm about to type these all off the top of my head.

Tips for school:
-Talk back to your teacher when you think she is wrong about anything. This will let her know that you are smart, and she will respect you for this.
-Always do your homework right before the teacher collects it, just make sure you finish it. This let's your teacher know just how hard you can work to accomplish your goals.
-Cheat off of the other kids' tests. This sends a signal to your teacher letting her know that you can find out anything you need to, and also that you'd be a good government agent.
-Pick on the fat/immature kids. Let them know where they'll be for the rest of their lives.

Tips for Parenting:
-Slap that baby. Teach it that screaming gets you no where in life unless you feel the need to destroy your spouse when he proposes.
-Shake that baby. Let it know ahead of time how badly life shakes people up.
-Bring that baby to a brown simmer, and apply the A1. OOPS, wrong blog!

Tips for Dating:
-She is NOT worth missing a football game(especially a Jets game ^_^)
-Unless she's Starky, feel free to let her know her place.
-Sex is mandatory. Make sure he/she understands that. Also, consider the below rule...
-Do not let him/her force you into sex, but remember that the above rule still counts.
-If the person in question is a zombie, I'm sorry it's probably not going to work out.

Tips for Zombies attacking your dwelling:
-If you live in a 2-story house, bring everything upstairs and if you can destroy the stairs.
-Once you are out of hope realize that you are screwed, just pull the trigger and get it over with, it's far better than being eaten alive.

That's all for now, hope these were helpful